Tag Archives: grey hair

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Glenda Going Silver

Going Silver: Seven Months and No Color

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So, here I am … seven months into my journey on Silver Linings Lane. Sadly, I did not take many pictures this month. This was a stressful time and it shows on my face, but I think my hair looks great! 🙂 Interestingly, in the pictures below you have to look really, really close to see the silver. Again, this whole notion that hair color is such a big deal is simply not true. We make it a big deal by comparing ourselves to others instead of loving ourselves – THE WAY WE ARE! I do not recall one person noticing my gradual switch to silver. I, on the other hand, as a social experiment asked friends, family, and colleagues how my hair looked and I got the same reply, “It’s not gray, it’s blonde!” What a hoot.

So, for all you women (and men) out there who are fretting about being in your natural state or finding your way back … lighten up (and I don’t mean more highlights … ha ha). Seriously, stop taking yourself SOOOO SERIOUSLY! Enjoy your life, enjoy the moment. Stop worrying about how you look, what people think, and live in the moment! If you do, you will find that you are more than a hair color, or a certain style. Take off the mask and show the world … who you really are underneath the facade. It’s liberating and a little scary, but worth it!

For years I heard my grandmother berate my mother for her hairstyle. My mother’s hair was either too short or too long. In my grandmother’s eyes, it was never good enough. What nonsense. It hurt my mother’s feelings and now that I am older and wiser, I see that my grandmother was insecure and taking it out on my mother. How insensitive. I love my grandmother, but this was a huge lesson for me. And might be why I am so determined to go silver and keep my long hair. I am not about to let other people hurt me because they are living in fear and insecure. Life’s too short. Do your own thing! You will always have critics and most of them will be the ones closest to you. But, you can rise above it. This is your journey, not theirs.


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Six months, no color - April 25, 2014

Going Silver: Six Months and No Color

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It is amazing to look back at the stages of going silver. I was so busy with work and grad school that I didn’t have time to focus on much else. Which is a good thing. I think this phase helped me focus on personal goals versus outward appearances. Over time and with that shift in focus, I began to get in touch with the non-conformist inside of me and I realized how liberating it is to do my own thing. Also, when you take the pressure off yourself to look a certain way, you are more in touch with the present and who you really are underneath the facade. As you can see from the pictures below … I know how to have fun. I can literally let my hair down and shake things up. Interestingly, while shaking my hair around in these pix, you can see the shades of gray taking over. I love it. So, lighten up without the highlights  … be yourself. Claim Susan Jeffers’ mantra: “I am powerful and I love it!” Own your power, own the right to do what you want, and let it fly!


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Five months, close-up no color - March 25, 2014

Going Silver: Five Months and No Color

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My next few posts will include mainly pictures … to chronicle my journey down Silver Linings Lane. I wish I had thought to take more close-ups … but, these pix will show how I enjoyed my life during my transition from golden to gray, or as I like to say … silver! 🙂

What really amazes me about this journey is that people have not noticed that I am letting my hair go gray. If they do notice, they aren’t saying anything to me. What is so obvious to me – isn’t to others. We are definitely harder on ourselves than others. I bring it up all the time and people are like, “Your hair just looks blonde. I don’t see gray” Unbelievable. There is quite a bit of blondish brown stuff, but still. It is so much more obvious to me. This is what I love about the journey … I’m learning to take myself less seriously! Life is so much easier this way … less stress, less worries. We should be grateful to HAVE HAIR. Tons of people who go through chemotherapy know what that means. So, we should be grateful for what God has given us! I know I am!


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Four months, no color - Feb 17, 2014

Another Benefit: Going Silver Saves Time

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Yes, you read that right … going silver can save you time!  Think about it. How many hours have you spent sitting in a salon chair lost in foils, soaking in smelly chemicals, and making small talk? I was lucky (and inconsistent), I went for high-and-low-lights every 3-5 months. I know, according to social norms, I should have been in the salon sooner, but carving out 2 1/2 hours for color and a cut was not easy. It was especially difficult when pursuing my mid-life masters. Now that I’m finished with grad school, I have a long list of things I want to do. And, I’m not going to get them done while soaking in chemicals!

In my last post, I mentioned an article by Ellen Miller that quoted Anne Kreamer, author of “Going Gray: What I Learned about Beauty, Sex, Work, Motherhood, Authenticity, and Everything Else That Matters”. Interestingly, while conducting research for her book, Anne learned that, “women spent more time getting their hair dyed than they did having sex.” Seriously?! I’m sure part of the reason women feel pressured to retain their youthful looks is to keep the spark alive with their partners. Yet, it seems something isn’t working here … at least for the people who Anne interviewed for her research.

So, why exactly are we dying our hair? Why are we convinced that we aren’t good enough just the way we are? And, why is growing old a negative thing? I’m so over it. I’m weary of advertisers trying to convince me that I need to be something I’m not, or trying to pressure me to hold onto something that has already passed (like my youth). My goodness, it’s time to rewrite the script. I don’t want to be one of those women spending more time getting my hair done versus investing my time making wonderful memories and doing enjoyable things!

In order to accomplish this, I have looked to other women who are on the silver path and in the process found an awesome group on Facebook – Going Gray Gracefully. It is so empowering to see the pictures and to read the posts. Others feel the same and that is why I am blogging about this. It helps me air my thoughts, work through my issues, and I hope to inspire others along the way. And, I want to leave a visual trail … pictures tell the story.

In closing, the pictures below are from February 2014 … four months into my journey down Silver Linings Lane. If you are thinking about going silver, what would you do with the time you saved from not coloring? I’m working on video editing projects and trying some new functional training sessions – just to name a few. I would love to hear what you are doing (in the comments section below)! Wishing you the best! 🙂

 

 


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Three months, no color (deconstructing cultural norms) - Jan 21, 2014

The Cost-Benefit of Going Silver

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Last week’s blog post brought up an interesting discussion on my Facebook page. I blogged about starting my journey down Silver Linings Lane and my friend Lynette Anderson Frantz, who has also chosen to go gray brought up a great point. She said, “I use the money I save from not coloring on pedicures. Love my pretty toenails.”

I am so glad Lynette brought this up because one of the resulting benefits of not coloring your hair is the money you will save … a true silver lining. This money can be channeled to a savings account or like Lynette chose … can be redirected to beautify another part of your body! For Lynette, it’s a win-win … she has silver sparkles on her head and pretty sparkly toes! I love it! Lynette’s comment really made me think about the amount of money I am saving. My high/low-lights could cost from $170 to $230 and I went approximately 4 times per year. At the top end that would be between $900/$1000 per year. Putting that money away and factoring in compounded interest is an idea that sparkles now and into the future! Or, redirecting that money towards yoga classes, hiring a functional training coach, or starting a new hobby would also be beneficial. I’m starting to look at my silver hair in a whole new way. It is a true cost-benefit to walk away from the chemicals and accept myself the way I am.

Let’s take a closer look at quantifying the cost of coloring your hair. I read a blog post by Ellen Miller on Angie’s List that quoted Anne Kreamer, author of “Going Gray: What I Learned about Beauty, Sex, Work, Motherhood, Authenticity, and Everything Else That Matters” as saying, “I did the math. In 25 years of coloring, I spent $65,000 on coloring,” Kreamer went on to say, “If I’d invested that in a college education for my daughters, that would have been awesome.” Hm. $65K? Wow! I’ve been highlighting my hair for a long time and I’m thinking about how much better the “money saved from coloring my hair” would look in an investment account with compounded interest right now! Ugh, why didn’t I see the light earlier?! At least I’m on the right path now … better-late-than-never to travel on Silver Linings Lane!

To that end, the pictures below are from January 2014 … three months into my journey down Silver Linings Lane. If you are thinking about going silver, what would you do with the money you saved from not coloring? I would love to hear from you in the comment section below!

 


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Janean & Glenda (Dec 2013)

Starting my journey to silver …

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As promised, I am documenting my journey on the road to Silver Linings! 🙂 The reality is … I might not make it all the way … there might come a day when I say … who the hell is that in the mirror and make an urgent call to Sonya, my phenomenal “colorizer” at Salon Fusion. It could happen, I am human! But, my goal is to try to enjoy the new, REAL me. And, hopefully … I will enjoy the journey so much that I can’t go back to the days of soaking in chemicals and sitting in salon chairs for excruciating, precious hours. Ready or not, here we go!

Now, the picture below (taken in Dec 2013) is certainly not flattering, but on my way to transparency, I must add the pix that I would normally pretend did not exist! I want this to be an open, honest journey. This particular day was gray and gloomy, I was worried about driving from Rochester to Minneapolis in the middle of a snowstorm. I was also concerned about making my flight. So, worry was written all over my face. But, let’s not concentrate on the face … we are here to talk about HAIR! 🙂 Which reminds me, one of my former hairdressers used to call straggly silver strands – “stress highlights”! I loved this terminology, it made me think!! And, I encourage you to ponder that phrase when you are stressing and try to put your pressures in perspective! Now, back to the pic below … at this time, I was only a few months into my journey and with my hair tied back and a bit of the blonde flowing about – I think I looked great.

Glenda at Mayo - Dec 2013

Glenda at Mayo – Dec 2013

Now, these next two pictures show how I had been “keeping it real” by only highlighting/lowlighting and not totally coloring every strand. You can see the silver peeking out on top in the picture with my sister, Janean. The pictures above and below were literally taken weeks apart. Then, in the picture of me from the back, you can also see (if you zoom in) that I have streaks of silver here and there. For those who are toying with the idea of going silver, I think it is an easier transition if you high-low/light your hair. Of course, that’s easy for me to say, I’ve never colored my entire head.

Janean & Glenda (Dec 2013)

Janean & Glenda (Dec 2013)

Glenda at Whitewater Falls, NC  (Summer 2013)

Glenda at Whitewater Falls, NC (Summer 2013)

Honestly, I think my hair looks good in these pictures. Of course, I still had tons of blonde flowing around. I might change my mind as time goes by.  I am trying to use positive affirmations and take in a steady diet of videos and articles by people who have trekked down the Silver Linings Lane. I am motivated to change … and, so far, have stayed the course! My career is demanding and runs me in circles and I am still recovering emotionally from losing my sweet 17-year old feline to cancer. That said, from what I’ve learned, tough times make you focus on what is important. Time spent reflecting on the essentials of life can give you the courage to do something brave! I tend to internalize Saint-Exupery’s words: “It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” Without these words, I doubt I would have externally bucked social norms. Thank you, St. Exupery! Let the journey continue! And, if you are reading this and have taken or have considered taking this path, please let me know! I would love to hear from you!


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